Bad mommy

Anthony and I are enablers.

Grace just got the news that she has to undergo orthopedic surgery next week because we didn’t keep her calm enough during the healing process. Her little hind leg is swelling and the bone is healing crooked. I am confident that all the jumping, stair-climbing, and walking/running she has done in the weeks since that naughty horse broke her leg is the primary reason for such a piss-poor healing process.

Granted, it is hard to keep an energetic dog down, but we have decided that the following measures may work:

a. Never ever leave home until she is healed. No work, no school, no walking out to the fire escape to water the plants. This should keep her from having to greet us with all that excited moaning and her famed (and enthusiastic) jackknife kick to the crotch.

b. Keep the conehead on 24/7. Mom, if you remember what that sweater did to Pookie, you will know exactly how Grace acts with the plastic guard on her head. The only difference is that Grace’s conehead is heart-breaking. (Except when she does that whole walking-into-walls thing – now that’s funny.)

c. Hook Grace up to a pee bag. Akoua has her red pee bucket (can I get a “Woot Woot!” for the Peace Corps?) and now Grace can have her own catheter. This should prevent us from having to confront the stairs or walking or running at potty time.

d. In lieu of the conehead but in collaboration with the catheter, strap Grace down to the bed and commence total belly rubbing for hours on end. So long as Animal Control doesn’t hear about this, we should be totally set.

e. When all else fails, dope her.